She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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