she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
