found the other keg... it's in the tree
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize