This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
