I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
too bad you live with your parents still
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm determined to sit on that face.
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