My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
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