How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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