i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize