if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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