i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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