Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I think I won the penis lottery.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize