Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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