sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smell my finger.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize