dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
