I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Randomize
