We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
