Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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