i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
