actually, I'm a sock model
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
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