just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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