hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
