I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
How naked do you want me to be?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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