Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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