I didn't shave. On purpose
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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