arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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