I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
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