The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize