PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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