im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
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