What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Randomize
