are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Randomize