this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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