Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize