wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
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