so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize