I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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