By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
