Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
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