did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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