No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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