Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize