bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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