Texts From Last Night

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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.

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  (480): I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is. http://tfl.nu/0bg6
  Replies (13) Good night (2312) Bad night (705)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.

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  (541): I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him. http://tfl.nu/i7hv
  Replies (32) Good night (1003) Bad night (5034)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.

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  (774): I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books. http://tfl.nu/zd3b
  Replies (14) Good night (3957) Bad night (821)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.

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  (281): The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself. http://tfl.nu/4mrf
  Replies (20) Good night (1490) Bad night (2763)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.

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  (321): I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one. http://tfl.nu/vil5
  Replies (15) Good night (5941) Bad night (1383)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.

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  (216): The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first. http://tfl.nu/lmqj
  Replies (8) Good night (1970) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.

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  (949): Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems. http://tfl.nu/qmb8
  Replies (7) Good night (1000) Bad night (1752)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.

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  (570): Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again. http://tfl.nu/7ky3
  Replies (8) Good night (2033) Bad night (930)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  My vagina supports interfraternal relations

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  (215): My vagina supports interfraternal relations http://tfl.nu/ji34
  Replies (9) Good night (1560) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance

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  (604): You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance http://tfl.nu/i8te
  Replies (2) Good night (1418) Bad night (487)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours

  (301): View more from Maryland

  ........yyyyyyeah that's me

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  (814): There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours (301): ........yyyyyyeah that's me http://tfl.nu/xtm1
  Replies (4) Good night (1478) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.

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  (651): Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called. http://tfl.nu/hamr
  Replies (1) Good night (990) Bad night (291)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....

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  (210): Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers.... http://tfl.nu/sake
  Replies (10) Good night (1352) Bad night (727)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life

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  (715): Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life http://tfl.nu/t3rv
  Replies (2) Good night (205) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row

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  (570): Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row http://tfl.nu/1fkf
  Replies (1) Good night (390) Bad night (253)

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