everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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