Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize
