Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
