the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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