Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
