I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I just forgot I was standing up.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
