If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
