Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
