R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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